By Sheefah Irambona
What Doesn’t Break Us: Rethinking Failure and Success
We’ve all heard the saying, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” We’ve listened to the songs, shared the quotes and perhaps even used it as a caption. But what does it really mean when life puts the saying to the test?
At its heart, the phrase suggests that hardship can build resilience. The challenges we survive can shape our character, strengthen our endurance and equip us to navigate whatever comes next. But perhaps more importantly, it challenges the way we think about failure.
For Nafisah Abrahams, failure is not something to fear. It is part of the process.
Nafisah, who has dedicated much of her life to people, partnerships, meaningful work and creating opportunities, was recently recognised as one of the Mail & Guardian 200 Young South Africans 2026 in the Technology & Innovation category. The recognition is a significant achievement, but her journey to that moment was not without setbacks.
“It’s okay to fail, it’s just about changing the approach of how you’re failing,” she says.
It is a refreshing perspective, but if failure is part of the journey towards success, why are we so afraid of it?
From a young age, we are often taught to associate success with achievement and mistakes with something to be avoided. Success is rewarded, while failure can feel like a reflection of our abilities, intelligence or even our worth.
Psychologically, this makes sense. Our brains can interpret failure as a threat, not only to our goals but to our sense of belonging and identity. As a result, we may avoid taking risks, trying new things or stepping outside what feels comfortable.
For Nafisah, shifting that mindset has been an important part of her journey.
A moment of recognition
Being named among the Mail & Guardian’s 200 Young South Africans was, for Nafisah, both humbling and deeply personal.
Coming from Mitchells Plain and going on to travel the world and receive national recognition felt like an “ultimate stamp” on everything she had worked towards.
Yet she is quick to acknowledge that success did not happen overnight.
Her journey has been shaped by hard work, passion, faith and, importantly, her people.
There is a familiar saying that it takes a village to raise a child. But perhaps, as Nafisah’s story reminds us, it takes a village to build anything meaningful.
She credits the people who have supported her from the beginning, her own “little village”, for helping her get to where she is today.
For Nafisah, success is not simply about reaching a destination. It is about understanding what you are passionate about, showing up for the people in your corner and continuing to move forward when things do not go according to plan.
Building a legacy
As she looks towards her next chapter, Nafisah has a clear ambition: “building something that cannot be broken and leaving the legacy behind that I have always dreamt of.”
Her story offers a powerful lesson, particularly during Women’s Month. Whether you are just starting out, finding your feet or stumbling through your next chapter, failure does not have to define you. Sometimes, it is simply part of the process.
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Photo: Supplied
